Fishy Tales From DFA Users

SoI bought a pile of chicken breast to make some teriyaki chicken for the Mrs. and little squealers from Coles. Problem is I don't know how to make teriyaki chicken, and after spending 20 minutes butchering up a whole bunch of dead no. 11 chook with a blunt carving knife I accepted defeat and pulled the pin on the project, offering the 'chum' instead to the dogs.

There must have been something about that chook cause the little mutts wouldn't have a whiff of it, so off it went into the canal with all the other goop people through into canals each day. I say 'all' when in fact a little swagger of the stinky meat fell on my left foot as I tossed it's skanky brethren a yonder.

Taking this as a sign I baited up the old rod and cast the line deep into the abyss of the murky brown canal with a no. 2 Shearing's belted brass widget for hook, and let the bait settle onto the muddy floor before setting the rig in my trusty Dawson's Fish Alert!!!

Well damn if I didn't forget all about that smelly bit of chook on a hook, and come midnight in rushes the Mrs. crying that the "Bloody Dawson's Fish Alert!!! was beep, beep, beeping it's head off!" and prolly rousing the neighbours from a snoozy snooze at that. So up like a jumbuck I jumped, outta me think'n chair and down to the waters edge where I found not only the rod and reel missing but also the Dawson's Fish Alert!!!

"Shiver me timbers!" I says to myself, "It must have been bloody Jaws!"

After scampering about in the pitch black of night for a bit I stumbled across the rod teetering on the edge of the concrete retaining wall. " Crikey !" I had but a sliver of a fraction of a second to grab the bugger before it went off into the canal towed down by who knows what?

But grab it I did, and for the next 15 minutes reeled and pulled and reeled and pulled and reeled and pulled until at last I had the great fish swimming in the shallows. Still not knowing what it was I had hooked, I yanked it hard-on one more time and watched as the fibreglass rod yielded to the mighty weight of the floundering monster and bent nearly to breaking point.

Carefully, and with all the might I could muster, I manoeuvred the fish over the fence onto the grassy knoll where he flapped and flopped about in protest. "Hey love come and get a gawk at this'n here monster Bream I just caught!" I yells to my Mrs. "And bring the flam'n Kodak with ya!"

So after a couple of happy snaps and a bit of admiring it's awesome size and beauty I returned the mighty Bream to his murky aquatic domain to live, and perhaps to fight another day.

All the best mate!

PS You'll be happy to know that the Dawson's Fish Alert was found hooked around the fence, a little worse for ware of the ordeal but still in perfect working order, ready for the next big one!